Why You Need a Coach

Coach Helping Hand

We need coaches because our instincts tend to get things wrong

You need a coach.

And the reason you need a coach is because business and life are counterintuitive. In other words, you can’t trust your instincts. In fact, if you try to trust your instincts, you’ll get it wrong 99% of the time.

I know, we all want to believe that we have some kind of “inner wisdom” that naturally guides us through life. But real life doesn’t work that way. Millions of closed businesses and broken dreams are testament to the reality of people who listened too closely to their instincts.

Of course, as a coach, you know this. If everyone could trust their instincts on everything, nobody would ever need guidance on anything. We could all just move forward in life with whatever our instincts tell us to do in any given moment, and magically everything would work out.

All coaching, and all learning, is about modifying and changing something that at first goes against our instincts. If you think about it, that’s why coaching exists.  It’s why your students or clients need you: because in so many areas of life, things are counterintuitive.

How Trusting Your Instincts Can Really Hurt You

Take the example of skiing. If you’ve ever been skiing before, you understand that you cannot trust your instincts.

Here’s what you see the first time you go skiing: You’re staring down this really steep hill covered in snow and ice. The most uncomfortable boots on the planet are snug about your feet up to the middle of your calves and clipped into two long, unwieldy, waxed fiberglass boards that, despite your best intentions, keep crossing each other. It’s 12 degrees and windy, and you wonder why anyone would ever subject themselves to this form of torture.

When you finally get the courage to start sliding down this freakishly scary hill, impending death becomes a certainty in your mind. So what do your instincts tell you to do? They tell you to lean back towards the mountain for safety.

But if you lean back on skis, guess what happens? They fly out from underneath you and you crash. It’s simply how physics works. And when your instincts fight against physics, physics are going to win every time.

You have to suppress that impulse to lean back, and do the scary thing: you have to lean FORWARD and point the tips of your skis straight down that terrifying hill. Can you learn to do it on your own? Sure…with a lot of pain.

How a Coach Can Help

But if you get a coach, you can cut that learning time dramatically, to maybe 10% of the time it would take you to learn to do it on your own.

It’s the coach’s job to get you to stop trusting your pre-existing instincts and to learn something new. And once you get over that fear and start to lean forward down the mountain, your body begins to respond differently. And that’s when the coach is able to help the most, because then they can instruct you on how to shift your weight from side to side, going from one edge of the ski to the other, and how to push off through turns and flex your legs when you go over the bumps.

Slowly you start to get the new behavior until the new behavior is what becomes instinctual. Of course, at first it’s exhausting, not just because you use muscles you’ve never used before, but because your coach has given you this long list of things to keep in mind. And that takes a heck of a lot of conscious effort.

But what that list gives you is a framework for understanding what goes wrong when you inevitably crash again. If you have a great coach, you realize that eventually, you’re coaching yourself.

A Coach for Business, Health, Relationships, and Life

Obviously, the skiing example is a metaphor for other kinds of coaches: the people who use Instant Teleseminar to mentor and guide others in a multitude of fields in business, relationships, and more. But the principles are the same: breaking the pre-existing, “instinctual” behaviors that are holding people back.

We have to find ways to gently remind people that their current “system” is what’s causing them to crash and burn, that they have to learn new behaviors to get what they want, and that we have ways to help them shortcut the process. Of course that takes time, which is why a preview call is such a vital tool in a coach’s toolkit: it often takes time to point out how much pain people are in.

The coach’s toolkit also includes lists of tips and worksheets for fast results and guided, rigorous thinking processes. And for those committed to lasting, deeper change, we create multi-module programs. The highest levels of mastery are reserved for coach-led mastermind groups of like-minded peers, and specialized one-on-one “VIP” sessions for high-end clients.

All of these tools and systems solve problems that people aren’t always aware of, and teach new behaviors that at first go against our clients’ intuitions and instincts.

And it also may be time to take a look at yourself. YOU need a coach. Because unless you’ve already gotten everything you want in business and in life, you may be needlessly clinging to instinctual behavior that’s unconsciously holding you back.

2 comments for “Why You Need a Coach

  1. April 30, 2016 at 12:36 pm

    Are there any coaches you recommend?

    • May 2, 2016 at 1:34 pm

      Coaching is a very personal decision that depends on specific circumstances that only a client can know. And timing is everything. What’s worked for me won’t necessarily work for others, given their situation and what they’re looking for. That said, when people ask my experience about a coach or program, I’ll share!

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